Relationship Musings: Live Your Love Life the Way YOU Like It

Many thanks to our freelancer KK for writing this post and sharing her story with us.

I met my fiancé when I was 20 and we fell in love bla bla bla… I’m not here to talk about that romantic crap.

But people ask me “don’t you regret seeing what else is out there before you settled down?” With the look on my face, everyone knows what I am thinking straight away.

A lot of people ask me this question and it always gets me annoyed. Well, maybe a little more than annoyed.

Let’s go back a little to when I was 18. I was the only virgin left in my high school except for some (you know who those people are).

I had in my head that I was actually going to wait until I was in a relationship and/or be with someone I was in love with.

Well, one of those was the case, or at least at some point I believed that it was (actually realised later I wasn’t in love with him, I was just in lust).

However, I still waited 3 weeks after I turned 18 to do the dirty dance, which was more time than anyone I knew.

But you know what, it actually felt right, no regrets on my end, he took care of me.

Anyway, I’ll never forget what he said when he dropped me home the next morning: ‘Now don’t go sleeping around with every guy you meet and become a slut’.

SLUT!!!!! I hate this word. It makes me cringe more than any other word in the dictionary. Whoever invented the word should be ashamed of themselves.

Why is that men can sleep with as many girls as they want and they get labelled a HERO? But then a girl sleeps with a few men and she’s a slut?

 
Uhhhh sorry for the outburst, let’s go back to the story.

So, you should know that I am the type of person when someone tells me not to do something, I most likely will do it.

It wasn’t my intention to become a slut but you know shit happens. I mean, I didn’t join a whore house or anything like that, calm down people, get your imagination back to the story!

So, I was labelled as a slut by many people.

But I now hold that title with pride. Let me tell you why.

Yes, I kissed many frogs and slept with many of them too. I was with many different men, all shapes and sizes, big, thick or thin. I was having fun and a lot of it.

I was seeing what I did and didn’t want from a man in the future. I sorted through them and knew that when “the one” came along that I would know what I wanted. Guess what? That was exactly the case.

I knew what people were saying about me. Of course, it hurt. I’m a hormonal bitch with a heart, but looking back today I don’t regret it at all.

Not only did I see what I wanted from a man in a relationship, I knew what I wanted in the bedroom. It gave me a voice of my own and not let the man dictate what he thought was feeling good for me.

The only thing I do regret is not having better friends back then. Most of them were the ones who spread the rumours and didn’t keep my secrets safe.

I can quite easily say I got all my experimenting ticked off my sex bucket list in only two years.

Now, let’s see the pros and cons of this….

Actually, you know what? I am not going to name any because in the end, it is up to you and what you want to do.

If you want to go out on 100 dates, then you should be able to do that.

If you want to dirty dance with a man, then go do that.

If you don’t want to, it’s up to you as well.

The only advice I can give you is, of course, be safe (that’s a given). Don’t have shitty friends like I did, don’t tell them what you have done unless you believe and trust them.

Always be the person in control of your own body and mind. Don’t avoid experiencing because you are afraid of being labelled as a slut. Do what it’s right for you. You may not know that you’re doing the right thing now. But you will.